It’s Possible


It’s Possible

Like a child in summer having arrived at the beach for the first time
I thrived, basking in the possibilities
The season could not stop me
It was November and I just turned twenty-one
It was cold, very cold in the water

Only the moonlight to find my way into the waves
My best friend waiting with a blanket when I finally came out
Nestled by the campfire my lips were blue
We laughed a lot
I was happy

I used to be so happy  .. .

oregon - florence 2

Life happens
You get discouraged
I thought to still be happy

I found no time to adjust and grieve for .. .
… what was
I wasn’t ready
Disappointments kept hitting me
One heart-string after another …
And still more hurt, more heartache

I wasn’t expecting this for myself
Surely I could still be happy
Wasn’t I?

I miss what is simple
A hand in my hand
Never having to second guess
or when
the ironic
the inevitable
the pathetic
would crush me

The lengths of lone pain .. .

But I remember what it felt like
Even in the cold rain alone
in the dark ocean
I was happy
i was

I haven’t laughed like that in .. .
When was that last time I was in the ocean
.. . with someone waiting to warm me, even ?
There must of been someone?
it seems like it
.. . that there should be
Should of been

Maybe– nah,
I don’t think there was, ever again
I would have remembered

… just once a love that journeyed on with me-

It’s as if I’m lost somewhere else in time .. .
My time, my youth it’s lost – all but gone .

If just maybe,
still … can be

… waiting for me, laughing,
brimming over!

Suppose to be different
… this life happening around me

Shall I just go in the waves, moon-luminous midnight

… aimlessly?

What a foolish notion
A dream .. . to be of one I (still)  have .. .

oregon - florence south jetty


Why must it be cloaked in sadness for me

Why should the most simple and pure of needs
not ever be found for me ?

Why is such a wicked question.

Why? Why, “why” is not the question,
“The question is not why”


oregon coast




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